Sometimes it's really hard

There are times when it's really difficult to be a working mom. For me, it's when my little girl calls me in the office crying over something I couldn't do anything about just because I'm not by her side.Just like yesterday, she called me up and she was really crying hard, I couldn't even understand what she was trying to tell me. In between her sobs, I was able to get some bits and pieces of what she was trying to tell me, and it was about her school bag -- her well-loved school bag. She said the handle was broken but she found the screw and she was asking me if it can still be repaired. She was also asking me if I still have the receipt with me so that we can return it to the store for repair. She was also very disappointed because she still remembered what the store clerk told her about the bag, that it was really made of very good quality material and yet, she has only used for one month and now the handle is broken. Too bad, the store has made a wrong impression on a little girl's mind.

She just stopped crying when I told her that I'll have her Dad call her, and I also assured her that her Dad will take care of it when we come home.

Oh well, if only we can always be with our kids...

The Ultimate Mommy Blog List

I was doing my usual rounds of different blogs when I came across the article by Guy Kawasaki, The Ultimate Mommy Blog List, in his website. Boy, am I glad I came across his list! He even provided brief descriptions for each site which is really helpful if you just want to scan the list first.

Mommies out there will also appreciate the note that he put in his post: Note: There is a contingent of readers of my blog who do not like when I write about blogs/blogging/bloggers. I’d guess there’s also a contingent who do not like when I write about non-business, non-tech, non-male subjects. To these readers, I say in advance: “You can never support a mom, much less a mommy blogger, too much, so deal with it.”

I've found some really nice mommy sites that are very interesting and with lots of informative articles. So, in your next blog hopping, just pick one or two from his list and read on!

We Have a New Pet

It couldn't fly because of broken wings, so, my father was able to get it while it was on top of our gate.

My kids were so happy since it's a new addition to our birds --- we already have 4 African Lovebirds. Now, we have another mouth to feed...

Duty - YouTube video

Whenever my youngest daughter asks permission to use our computer, she always visits YouTube.com, and most of the time, she watches Hillsong-Eagle's Wings. She always opens it as her background music even when she's playing online in her favorite website, y8.com.

Last Saturday, as she was again listening to her favorite music, she came to me and said she cried as she was watching a video that she saw in youtube. It was entitled Duty, and the background music was Still, by Hillsong. She said it was about a boy who was entrusted by Jesus to watch over the cross until His return. She urged me to watch it, and yes, true enough, the video was so touching.

I would like to share with you the video here:

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The importance of involving the kids

In our household, we regularly hold family meetings and we include in the agenda the financial status of our family.

I prepared a spreadsheet of our budget, with all the details of our payables (debt/loans), daily/weekly/monthly expenses and posted it on the wall in our bedroom. I then showed it to our kids so that they're aware of what's happening.

My kids are ages 15, 13, and 8, and believe me, they understand what me and their Dad are trying to tell them. Now, they can fully comprehend why they cannot always have the things that they want.

There was even one instance when my son couldn't use his Gameboy. He said, it must be the charger that's not working. So, i brought both the unit and the charger to the store, and luckily, he was right, we only needed to buy a new charger. So, i bought one, although it was quite expensive -- well, because it wasn't included in our budget -- because i knew he wasn't able to use for quite some time already. When I reached home and told him that it was just the charger that was defective, and i told him that it was quite expensive, he was even the one who said, "Mommy, it's OK, don't buy yet, we can just buy it later". I told him that i've already bought one and the reason why. Then, i told him that i appreciate what he said. He then told me that he's very much aware of all the expenses that we're having most especially because, everyday, he sees the spreadsheet that i posted on our bedroom wall.

So, it really helps to involve your kids.

Even young children, like my youngest, who is just eight years old. One time she said that her favorite toy, Barney, badly needs a playmate. She wants me to buy her a Baby Bop stuff toy. When i explained to her that we didn't have money to buy one for her, she understood. I just assured her that we will save for it.

We're teaching our kids to be more conscientious of their spending, and to be fully aware and able to distinguish between a want and a need, and i'm sure we're on the right track, because we're also building their future.

We know that they'll appreciate this more once they get older or once they have their own families.

Want to Save on Grocery Expenses?

In my family, what works best is when my husband does the shopping! He really sticks to what's in his list. He's very good at that, and for that, i'm very much grateful.

I came up with some pointers that are working in my family:

• We list down the items that we need to buy, and we really bring it to the grocery store. Armed with the list, we then try to avoid buying anything that's not on our list.
• We also patronize store brand items. This is where we save the most, because a quarter of the price of the branded items are slashed if we buy store brand items.
• We rarely bring our kids to the grocery store, because more often than not, there would be an additional item like candies or biscuit that aren't in our list. Sometimes, my youngest daughter would request to have a toy, although it's a cheap one, i still find it a waste of money especially if after a day or two i just find it lying around the house, completely forgotten.
• I bring a calculator to the store and add-up the items to make sure that i'm within the budget.
• I carefully check the labels of the products and compare costs per ounce, because items which are individually wrapped almost always cost more per ounce. Although an exception to this is for those perishable items which I normally buy in smaller quantities.
• I also take advantage of bundled items in my favorite grocery store. With these bundled items comes a free item, like, soy sauce, sugar, iodized salt -- all store-brand. This also saves me a lot of money because the budget that i allocate for these items which i get for free, can now be used for the other items in my list.

Lots of plants and flowers

I joined the Homemakers Club in our office, and last May 3, the club organized a garden tour with the Philippine Orchid Society. Actually, I'm not into gardening, but I joined the tour because I wanted to take pictures of flowers and orchids. We went to various places in Laguna, and our first stop was in the Makiling Botanical Gardens. There were lots of flowers and plants there and I had a blast using my camera. We also went to the Orchids Show in San Pablo Laguna, and several other gardens like the Gintong Talulot and the Golden Petals Orchids.

It was such a nice experience because although there are many clubs in our office, I can't find the time to join any of them, and I think this was the first time that I actually joined a trip.

Twos

Tag from JB:

Two names you've gone by: Fer & Pearl
Two things I’m wearing right now: white pants & peach blouse with blazer
Two things I have in a relationship: love & trust
Two of my favorite things to do: digital scrapping & blogging
Two things you did last night: helped my youngest daughter with her assignments & updated my blog
Two people you last talked to: annie & egay
Two things you’re doing tomorrow: have hot oil treatment & lunch with my office friends
Two longest car rides: 12 hours Cavite to Pagudpud & 7 hours Cavite to Baguio
Two favorite holidays: christmas & new year
Two favorite drinks: mango & banana smoothies (Fruitas) & iced tea
Two things about me you may not have known: i don't like dishwashing & i'm afraid of closed spaces
Two jobs I’ve had in my life: clerk & executive secretary
Two movies I would watch over and over: can't remember any right now
Two favorite foods: crabs & shrimps
Two places I’d rather be right now: at home with my kids & boracay

Grab this tag and post on your blog!

Make your marriage adultery-proof

I was checking on my back issues of Kerygma Magazine when the cover of the May 2007 issue caught my attention: Make Your Marriage Adultery Proof by Vic & Ditas Español. I decided to bring it and during the ride to the office, my DH and I discussed it.

The authors said that there are 4 Infidelity Busters:

(1) Decide to make your marriage as your top priority each day
(2) Know your spouse's needs
(3) Nurture intimacy
(4) Put God in your relationship

Sometimes it's difficult to nurture a relationship when you are faced with everyday stress that is part of raising a family. It's not easy to meet the demands of each of your child and still satisfy the needs of your spouse. But who said life will be easy? It all depends on how you communicate your needs to each other, as well as the respect, trust, and love that you have for each other. And the authors were right when they said that the best antidote to infidelity is a God-centered marriage. We have been involved in a spiritual community for the past 7 years and this has really helped our relationship. Petty quarrels and disagreements are short-lived because we know that this is not what God wants for our family. It's also very important that you surround your family with people who are God-fearing and who have the same values that you want your children to have.

Just when we thought fewer people...

...are bringing their cars now.

I took this photo last night while driving in EDSA. Traffic was bad from Shaw to Guadalupe, although according to the authorities, there was a 10% reduction of vehicles in EDSA due to the continuous increase in the prices of gasoline. But actually, I also noticed the difference because before the traffic was really bad from Ortigas all the way to Magallanes, unlike now when it's still somewhat tolerable.

Everytime there's an increase in the price of gasoline, I never fail to do the Math to know whether it will be much better for us to just commute to work, but as of now, the difference of Php20.00 between commuting and bringing the car is not practical at all, because, admittedly, it's still much, much comfortable to have a car. But most probably, when the gas goes up to Php80/liter, we'll have to talk again about other options.

Do you believe in guardian angels?

I have a friend in the office who always calls her guardian angel whenever she lost something. And her guardian angel never fails her. She always finds whatever it is that she's looking for. So, one time, I told her, I think I will now start talking to my guardian angel. That was when she told me the story behind her fondness for her guardian angel. During her college days, she tried to talk to her guardian angel and told him that if he's real, he should let her know his name. Afterwards, she didn't realize that she fell asleep, and in her dream, she saw a scroll, and when it opened, she saw a pen writing down a name, and then she woke up. So, she said, it must be the name of her guardian angel. But she didn't stop there, she talked again to her guardian angel that if that was really his name, let her encounter that name once again. Then later, while she was reading a comic book, one of the characters that appeared in the book was the same name as what was written in the scroll in her dream. So, from then on, she called her guardian angel by that name.

Isn't it an amazing story?

We all know as Mommies that guardian angels are always there to protect our kids, especially when they were still babies. In my experience, when my son was still a baby, he fell from our bed, but when we saw him, he was not hurt because he was lying on a pillow --- and we have always believed that it was his guardian angel who saved him and who put the pillow under him.

Health Concerns - Part 1

Back in 2005, I was diagnosed with PVCs (premature ventricular contractions), which is one type of Arrhythmia. Further tests turned out normal and the source of my skipped beats was never found out. I was given Cordarone and I took it for 2 years, until my cardiologist asked me to stop taking it last January 2008. He said that the medicine has too many side effects, and the major one was its effects on my thyroid. My last thyroid function test last April was not good, but I wasn't given medicines because the doctor said we should wait for the Cordarone to get off my system. I was just given Inderal-Propranolol for my palpitations, which is milder than Cordarone, but for 3 months I stopped taking it because I was feeling better. I was really hoping that I could get away with not having maintenance medicines.

But just recently, my skipped beats are back. I was supposed to have my Treadmill Stress Test, as part of my Annual Physical Examination in my office. But my ECG was so bad that the doctor didn't allow me to proceed. She gave me prescription for Inderal again and asked me to go back to my cardiologist.

During this time, the results of routine blood tests, again, as part of my annual PE, came back, and as in the past years, I'm still anemic. From as far as I can remember, I've been anemic all my life, and I've also been reading a lot of information from the Web that anemia can cause palpitations, and it was confirmed by our doctor in the clinic, that indeed, anemia can cause skipped beats. She insisted that I go to a Hematologist for further evaluation. Actually, another doctor has advised me to go a hematologist since last year, but I didn't, because I was scared of what the doctor might find out. But, i think, right now, for my sake, and for the sake of my family, i really need to go to the specialists.

So, for the past 2 weekends, I got busy with consulting an Endocrinologist and a Hematologist. From the endocrinologist, it was good news! My thyroid function test turned out normal, although, I still have 3 nodules in my thyroid - which just need regular monitoring. For the Hematologist, she asked me to undergo several blood tests, and when I got the results, everything was not normal. When I brought the results to my Hematologist for interpretation, she said that my red blood cells were very small, that's why I'm anemic, and the quality of my RBCs are pale. I got scared! But she said there's nothing that I should be worried about. She said she will just put me on full dosage of Iron tablets and after a month, she will check if my RBCs will improve, if not, she will do another test to check if I have Thalassemia. I almost freaked out because from what I had read, this is a rare disease and in fact, there were still very few information available about this disease until just recently. But, she assured me that I would only need vitamins if in case I was diagnosed with it. She also said that she's almost certain that I only have Iron deficiency anemia and it can be corrected once I take the full dose of iron tablets. She also mentioned that this could also be the reason why I had Cholecystectomy --- my gallbladder was removed last 2004, because gallstones formation has something to do with the quality of my RBCs. I was really surprised when she said this because I didn't know that my being anemic has something to do with the removal of my gallbladder. But when I did some research in the Internet, there is really a connection between the two.

"Iron deficiency anemia is playing a significant role in the super-saturation of gallbladder bile with cholesterol and may act as an independent factor in formation of cholesterol gallstones. Gallbladder bile cholesterol level is significantly higher in the anemic individuals, as compared to that of the non-anemic patients."

I still have skipped beats once in a while, I just try to ignore them by relaxing a bit and taking deep breaths. And for my anemia, hopefully, after a month, my blood tests will improve.

For now, I just keep on praying that everything will be alright...

New Layout

After lots of trial and error, finally, I have finished my layout header. I hope you liked it...

I changed my layout because I find black to be a bit gloomy for a Mommy blog, so, I changed it into something pastel and light...

Have a nice day, everyone!

Extra Money

Today, I received an email from Triond.com advising me that I can now claim my payout amounting to US$54.60 from Western Union. Wow! that was good news! This is my second payout from Triond, the first one was US$52.00, and I'm really happy and excited to claim it. I'm planning to change my payment preference to Paypal so that I can get my income every month, unlike checks with the minimum of US$50 before the company sends the payment.

So, why not help me in earning more by reading my articles which you can find in the right sidebar here in my site: "My Articles", or you can also go to the tabs on top of my header.

Thanks a lot! Cheers!

I felt so guilty...

My son, who's in 4th year HS, rides with us every morning on our way to the office. We just drop him off to a place where he just needs to ride a tricycle going to his school. So, today, it was the same scenario. He rode with us, and he even asked for a few coins and then we dropped him off. When I was parking the car in my office, I saw his cellphone at the back seat, then later on, I saw a message in my cellphone (it was turned off the whole time...) from him that he left his cellphone and his wallet in the car. I didn't think much about it because I thought he just texted me using his friend's cellphone, and that he was able to borrow money from his friend.

It was only later when his Dad and I reached home that we learned from my mother that he went back to the house to get money from his Lola. And I really felt guilty when my mother said that he walked all the way back to our house (it was like a 6 km. walk) because he had no money except for the Php5 coin that we gave him, and he even spent the Php3 to text me --- which of course I didn't get because my cellphone was off! He waited for us for 20 minutes hoping that we will go back. Oh my goodness! I really felt so guilty! When he arrived home, I asked him what happened to him and he narrated everything. It was raining hard, and he was late in his class (only 5 minutes left in his 1st subject).

Lessons learned --- in case it happens again:

Keep spare money in his bag's pocket.
Keep our contact numbers in his bag -- he forgot the celllphone number of his Dad, he only remembered my number.
Just walk to the school and borrow money from his friends instead of going back to the house.

And best of all, his Dad and I just considered this as one of the many experiences that he will encounter in his life in one way or another...

Being a Working Mom

It has always been my dream to be a full-time mom to my kids, but circumstances didn't permit me to do that. But, I'm still hoping...

Being a working mom is difficult, especially in my case since my house is quite far from my workplace. Travel time can be really frustrating, especially when my kids tell me, "Mommy, where are you now?... What time will you be here?... I need your help in my assignment... Can you please review me for my quiz tomorrow?"

I get guilty trips whenever my youngest daughter tells me, "Mommy, I missed you today..." or "Mommy, I hope you don't have to go to the office anymore..."

There are things in life that we just have to accept, and in my case, this is one of those. Much as I would like to be a stay-at-home mom, i can't be, so, I just settle for what life has given me, and just make the most out of it. But still, I get guilty whenever my kids don't get high grades in their quizzes or in their quarterly exams, because, I always think, they could have done better if I was able to monitor them closely. Oh well... I know I shouldn't feel this way... it's just that sometimes I feel I haven't given them my "all"...

One of the wonders of not being with my kids most of the day is, when I get the chance, like, when I can take a leave from my work, I really maximize my time with them. I drive them to school... if not, I fetch them from school. My youngest daughter will really "take advantage" and ask me to buy her and her sister ice cream from the canteen, or juice, or anything. Sometimes, I surprise them by going home early and wait for them to arrive. These are special moments with them and we cherish these. I know they will always remember this, because what makes it special is its spontaneity.

Simple Living

It has always been my opinion that the clutter around us reflects how our mind works. Living in a country where a househelp is almost always readily available, organizing my household is not much of a daunting task. The problem crops up when my househelp goes on vacation or leaves for good, then, I will have to find a replacement.

Having three kids have always been a challenge when it comes to trying to accomplish these tasks. It's a good thing that my two eldest kids can already do basic chores, like washing the dishes, or cleaning the dining table, or fixing their beds.

I believe that we can make our lives easier by eliminating or minimizing some of the tasks that contribute to the clutter in our household or in our home office. Some of these might be:

Throw it Away

Instead of trying to find items on your desk, which are "supposed to be there", why not spend your time and energy in organizing your desk, so that later, you wouldn't have to worry about being late for your meeting just because you couldn't find the report that you need to present? Set aside at least 3 hours of your time, depending on the clutter on your desk, and vow to throw in the trash the files that you haven't even looked at for the past 6 months.

Sort It Away

Put out four boxes and label them as: For Action, Pending, For Filing, Trash. Go through your files/papers. If one item needs to be taken care of immediately, place in the "For Action" box. If it's an item that needs to be done in the next couple of days, place it in the "Pending" box. For completed items, put these in the "For Filing" box.

File Away

You should be able to find the files that you need within 60 seconds, otherwise, consider your current filing system as inefficient! Label your folders correctly and organize them in a filing cabinet.

Read Away

Set aside an hour each day to read through your letters and respond immediately. Don't put it off, make the decision now, tomorrow you'll have more mails.

At the end of the day

Spend the last 15 minutes of your day getting organized. It will help you keep your commitment to a clutter-free life. File away what's on your desk that wouldn't need for the next day. Put everything back to where they belong. And don't forget to make a "To Do" list for your tasks for the following day.

Being an Only Child

I have always dreamed of having my own brothers and sisters.

Now, more than ever, I feel the need for the presence of my own siblings, actually, I always tell myself, even one sister or brother would be enough.

While growing up, I longed to have somebody to turn to whenever times were rough with my parents. I envy my friends who had lots of siblings, although I know, they were not always in good terms, but at least, they had each other.

Back then, I experienced how difficult it was to be the center of attention of my parents. I wasn't as free to go out like my friends. I can still remember, I was first year in College when I first experienced an out-of-town trip with my classmates during our educational trip in one of our subjects. Although it was just an overnight trip, I really had difficulty in asking permission from my parents. They just relented when I told them that it was a requirement in school. And it was true, of course, i have always been a good girl. Never did I join a wrong set of friends. It was a "house-school-house" routine for me back then.

But being an only child also has its advantages, like, having all the attention of your parents all by yourself, not having to share your toys with anyone, eating all the chocolates in the refrigerator without worrying that you are supposed to just take a bite because you still need to share it with your sister/brother.

And now, being a Mom. How did it change the traits that I grew up with? First, I always tell my kids to always be thankful that they have each other, that no matter what happens, the fact still remains that they are siblings. And although they are not always in good terms (well, this isn't new with having 2 teenagers and 1 eight-year old in one roof!), their Dad and I always instill in their minds that when they are all adults, they will learn to appreciate the presence of each other. Second, I always tell them to enjoy their school life, their school friends, their church friends, their cousins. I'm not so strict when it comes to allowing them to join various field trips in school or in our church, because I want them to enjoy the things that I did not experience when I was their age.

But, of course, there are still times when the years of growing up alone still get the better of me. I sometimes prefer to be left alone ---- no kids allowed please! and there are still times when I'd buy a chocolate bar for myself --- no sharing please! But my kids and my dear husband already know these things, and he would even say to the kids, "Don't touch that chocolate ha, it's Mommy's"...